Ballad of the Warner Sister
by Guy With Animaniacs Addiction
Summary: Dot gets more than presents for Christmas. One-shot, prequel to Fanimanifics!


Ballad of the Warner Sister

The day is Christmas Eve of 2014. Now, this takes place in the same universe as Fanimanifics, a world where alien gems protect the Earth in real life, a world where World War III happened thanks to the uncontrollable powers of a boy experimented by the Japanese government, and a world that...oh God, where does begin? Two genetically altered mice on a quest to take over the world, a retired squirrel cartoon character, and various other strange creatures. Of course, the strangest and most unusual of them all are the Warner siblings.

Or rather, they used to be. Since their show was cancelled in the late '90s, they've settled down, and simply lived a life, although, they still wreck havoc and torment celebrities, but not as much as they used to. Most of all, since then, the sole female even got a _job_ , of all things.

As a voice actor dubbing anime.

"But…my son…he was of use, correct?"

"Cut! No, Dot, it's 'But my son, he was _helpful_! You're saying your lines so...awkwardly!" the voice director had complained.

Dot was extremely tired at that point, as she had to dub so many shows in one afternoon, which eventually extended into the night. _Assassination Classroom, Fairy Tail, One Piece,_ and currently, _Attack on Titan,_ and that's just a few. Yes, she only did side characters, but never did she have to do so many at once. And what a night to do it on than the day before Christmas! It was 9:45 PM, she should be home by now, spending time with her only two family members!

"Yeah, well, I'm burnt out! I've been here since 3 in the afternoon dubbing the millionth episode of _One Piece_!"

"Okay, yeah, we're sorry about that, but don't worry, you'll be home before 10. But please, we need to get these out by spring! Just please get this one line right!"

Dot just stood there with a face of defeat and gave in with a sigh.

"Now!"

"But…my son…he was helpful, yes? Even if he didn't achieve usefulness-"

"CUT! Dot, you're supposed to be in denial! What you just said makes the character look like a douche!"

"Okay, okay, give me a break!"

"Now!"

"But…my son…he was helpful, yes? Even if he didn't achieve direct grape...GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Cut!"

"Look, can we edit the episode short and end it here?"

"No! Say your line!"

Dot grunted in defeat.

"Now!"

"I'M IN DENIAL, GIVE ME GOOD NEWS ABOUT MY SON!"

"Oh, God damn it, Dot!"

"But, oh! You should not use the Lord's name in vain," Dot said in a mocking voice, as if she was one of those religious freaks within the actual show, "OR THE TITANS WILL GET YOU!"

The voice director was seething with rage, and looked like he was ready to beat the living stuffing out of Dot's body. The others on the other side were trying to hold him down, but the director prevailed, and screamed so loudly that the maxiglass was shaking. Thankfully, Dot couldn't hear it, because, well, the room was sound-proof.

"Wow, you've sank so low in one afternoon." Dot smugly commented, with a smirk.

Unfortunately, she wasn't smiling any longer when the director actually **broke** the maxiglass with his two fists, though not into tiny pieces, just into two halves. When they fell to the ground of the sound-proof room, Dot could only stare. Stare at the mark he made, and what mark he will make. There is only one option.

Run.

"Well, gotta blast!"

Dot made a break for it and attempted to get out of the almost empty building, but the director was too fast. For her, at least. He grabbed her by the neck and clenched the fist as hard as he could, signifying the frustration he went through over the whole day. Only then did Dot leave the building, but not as a free woman. No, still in the director's threatening hand, she was thrown onto the snowy ground outside, and, unfortunately for her, there were 5 inches of it. She lied deep in the frigid snow, nearly freezing, thinking it couldn't get any worse.

That was, until, he felt the director's foot. The painful, repetitive stomping of his right foot onto Dot's body had begun, and just kept on going for about 1 and a half minutes. For Dot, it felt like hours, and his yelling didn't help at all.

"HERE'S YOUR CHRISTMAS, HERE'S YOUR CHRISTMAS, HERE'S YOUR CHRISTMAS, HERE'S YOUR CHRISTMAS, **HERE'S YOUR CHRISTMAS!** " he roared with each step.

When it was all over, and Dot just stood in place, with obvious, visible bruises on her skin and fur, on that same spot she was thrown onto from the Funimation building, the director just...walked away. He felt no remorse. Time is money, he said, who cares about the actors, he said. This wasn't the first time, either. He got into a gunfight with Spike Spiegel, and that landed the space cowboy into the hospital, no joke. But nobody knew. He was just there, and he received his paycheck because of that…

Dot was lucky she was a toon, otherwise, she'd be dead…

That doesn't mean she couldn't pass out from the pain…

* * *

The first thing Dot heard when she regained consciousness was whistling. It sounded like Yakko, and she sure hoped it was Yakko, and not a doctor. Thankfully, it was her elder brother, sitting right beside Dot's legs, with one leg in a horizontal position, on top of the other. She could recognize the song he was whistling from anywhere, whenever it came on the radio around this time of year.

"Hey...you're whistling _Green Bird_ , aren't you?"

Yakko noticed that Dot was awake, turned his head towards her, and gasped.

"Dot, you're okay! Well, I knew that, considering you're not wearing any casts or anything of the sort, _but you're AWAKE!_ "

"I sure am. What day and time is it, anyway? Oh no, I hope I didn't miss Christmas!"

"Nope, you're just in time! It's 7 in the morning on Christmas Day!"

"Really?! Oh, well, that's won-"

Dot sat up, and noticed the...different atmosphere.

"Uh, oh dear eldest brother of mine?" Dot asked sweetly, as if nothing had happened.

"Yes?"

"Why, pray tell, have you changed the entire interior of our water tower to look exactly like a spaceship from an anime that ended nearly 20 years ago?"

"20 years? Jesus, time flies when you're immortal. "Well, sorta immortal."

Indeed, the entire inside of the infamous water tower was completely changed to be an exact replica of the infamous _Bebop_ , the spaceship that bounty hunters once used. Well, technically, they _will_ use it...uh, this is just a show we're talking about here, so there is really no chronology to even use. Everything looked futuristic, and absolutely everything was updated to the famous, Awesome but Impractical 2071 technology, to absurd levels. Like, you´d think something was an oven, but instead, it was a goddamn washing machine.

"Did...did you do all of this decorating just for me? In such a short time period?"

"Well, not really. Wakko also did a lot of the work, too."

"Here I am!"

Wakko ran out of one of the new doorways and to the couch that the other two siblings were stationed at.

"Oh my God, thank you both!"

Dot jumped up and stood up on the couch and grabbed both of her brother with long arms and gave them both simultaneous hugs, one for each arm.

"I couldn't have asked for a better present!"

"Yeah, we know," Yakko admitted, "but we got you another present, anyway!"

In true Warner fashion, Yakko pulled a small box right from behind his own back, which was only the size of a CD case. It could have been a music album, or even a video game, for all she knew. Dot eagerly snatched it out of his hands and ripped the wrapping down to shreds.

Considering the theme, with her own two gloved hands, she held _the official Cowboy Bebop game for the original PlayStation that was only released in Japan_. Yeah, if you couldn't tell, she really loves that series, and considering how much she loves it, you're lucky that text does not involve audio, or you´d need ear replacement surgery after the shriek of joy Dot had let out. Good thing the two brothers worse ear plugs.

"Oh my goodness, you shouldn't have! How could it get any better?"

"Two things. One, how would you like to know that I personally went out into the California winter myself to save you from 5-inch snow?"

Dot just waited there as she realized how much of a good brother Yakko really was.

"Yakko...you're the best brother anyone could ever have." Dot cheesily complimented with a smile.

"...Daw, it warms my heart that you're so out-of-character for one day out of the whole year."

"Hey, it's Christmas. What did you expect?"

"Aww...now, for the second thing...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, let's play a fun game!"

"Huh?" Dot asked.

"Oh, you'll love this game! It was especially planned, just for you and us, by us! Oh, and the Burbank Police Department."

"What?"

"Lady and gentleman, I introduce you to…" Yakko introduced.

A tall wooden crate, big enough to hold a person, suddenly fell from the ceiling, and one could notice the big hole on top of it.

" _ **MURDER THE PERSON THAT NEARLY KILLED**_ _ **OUR**_ _**SISTER!**_ "

The head of the voice director suddenly popped out of the hole, and he yelled, "This is inhumane, this is cruel, and it's probably not a very economic execution!"

"We-he-hel, look who's talking. Now, let's begin."

Yakko pulled out a pistol, Wakko pulled out a mallet twice the size of his own head, and...Dot did not have a weapon.

"Hey, what am I supposed to use?"

"Good question! Go get the the double-sided flaming chainsaw missile launcher."

"Okay!"

"..."

"Oh no."

* * *

 **Aw, they're bonding! Well, depending on your time zone, Merry Early/On Time/Late Christmas! Hope you all have a great time with your families, even if you get clothes as a present!**


End file.
